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Exhale

Our dreams become fears as we lay in our bed
So we'll count the day's until we are dead
Preying on fear to protect our very own
Because the only love I've ever known
Is the love you've never really shown
And I'd rather never feel it once than feel it again
Because there's no worse feeling then knowing
I came second to him
I was only a shooting star blink and I'm gone
I thought this is my chance to shine but I was wrong
But he is the sun you'd rather see every day
And that leaves me here in my bed as I lay
The things I once dreamt are the things I now fear
And there's only three words that I really wanna here
Night turns to light as his day begins
And these are my last words
The final end.

Not stoked on thanksgiving or this state.

I really hate not being able to goto Arizona for thanksgiving. I love it there, and I know most of you think I'm some;  Arizona obsessed nut job, but It really is better than god-forsaken California. I hate it here. Everyone is so fake. You have the kids who think their gods gift to man, preppy little wanna-be rich kids who look for drama and act like they're on Laguna Beach or the OC. Or you have these little wanna be thugs who "rep" shitty gangs and start shit if you even look at them wrong, not to mention they ALL tag, well at least they pretend to. Worst of all are the shitty party kids who make people think going to raves and doing crack, heroine, coke, and 'E' is cool. You all are a waste of life and the world would be a much better place if you just blew your brains out. California is a decrepit wasteland. And fuck your shitty beaches, sand covered in trash, and scum infested waters.
"Let an earthquake crumble it, let the fires rage, let it burn to fucking ash and then let the waters rise and submerge this whole rat-infested place." - The 25th Hour

I still find it amazing

I am still in awe that music can control and manipulate me so well. I am determined to do something musically worth while in my life. To give another kid growing up, the same feelings I've experienced. To change one heart one mind that's all I want. Fuck the fame, the fortunes, it all only gets in the way. Aside from that I'd like to be able to tour with a band just once. To perform on stage, to look a one kid in the eye and give them the feeling as if the song was written just for them. That is music in it's purest form to me.

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